Full Circle (Compassion is Nine-Tenths the Law of Karma)

By Wakingspirit.com ©

November brings the freezing moon

Frost gift wraps the naked trees

Gone is the lush greenery of June

Half circle spins summer to winter breeze

Full circle comes around before too soon

It was Wednesday, a month and half since Sandra bought a kayak as a birthday gift for Oliver, her husband. She was back at the Peak Experience Shop to buy some kayak paddling gear. She went up to the cash register to make her purchase. At the counter was a customer ahead of her – a beautiful young woman in her early twenties. She was talking to Trent, the owner.

‘My fiancé, Sidney, came here about six weeks ago and sold his kayak…a white Current Designs model…do you remember that?’ she asked.

‘Yes, he wanted me to sell it on consignment for him,’ replied Trent, ‘in fact, the lady right behind you bought the kayak.’

The woman turned around. She was fighting back tears. There was an awkward silence, but worse, Sandra intuitively knew what was coming next.

‘I’d like to buy back the kayak,’ the young woman desperately said – not being able to hold back her tears any longer.

‘I’m sorry…I gave it to my husband for his fortieth birthday the week after I got it – we even went out for a three week trip with it,’ replied Sandra, ‘he’s in love with it – I swear if it could fit in the bedroom he’d store it there.’

‘My name is Alexandra…I didn’t know that Sidney, my fiancé, was doing this to raise money for an engagement ring,’ said Alexandra. ‘When I found out I was devastated because this kayak meant the world to him – he saved up for four years to buy it and he paddled it in very special places – one summer he paddled the entire shoreline of Lake Ontario to raise funds for cancer as a tribute to his mom who died shortly afterwards of the illness.’

‘I was so upset when I found out he sold it,’ said Alexandra, ‘I swore I’d get it back.’

‘Clearly, I can’t promise you anything without first talking to my husband about it,’ said Sandra, ‘if you give me your phone number I’ll call you.’

 **************************************************************

The next evening Sandra was out with her girlfriends. Every Thursday Sandra had a potluck dinner with a diverse group of girlfriends at one of their homes – it was a forum to have fun and sing songs, but quite often they discuss personal or community issues. At this gathering Sandra would put her moral dilemma on the table. This should be interesting Sandra thought as her girlfriends had diverse backgrounds – each one of them will offer up different advice.

Over their lasagna dinner Sandra explained her predicament – the entire Alexandra and Sidney romance story and the gifting of the kayak to her husband. After finishing her plate of lasagna Barb took a sip of red wine and piped in first.

‘In Christian beliefs there are clear rules and boundaries in the bible about rightful ownership and stealing of objects – we all know “thou shall not steal”,’ Barb said, ‘if you keep the kayak you’re not breaking any rules. You paid for it fair and square. But then there are a few Christian fundamentals about being compassionate and a Good Samaritan.’

‘I thought about that,’ said Sandra, ‘and I also thought about Saint Anthony - the Patron Saint associated with the return of lost articles and missing persons.’

‘That’s an important consideration,’ replied Barb, ‘people pray to Saint Anthony for help in finding almost everything that is lost, from car keys and misplaced papers to a lost job, a lost lover, a wayward son or a straying partner. People who are regarded as "lost souls" may also be placed in his care.’

‘Yes, it’s a pretty widespread definition of what “loss” encompasses,’ said Sandra, sounding alarmed.

‘And let us not forget Saint Thomas Aquinas,’ interjected Barb, ‘I roughly remember him saying that  man should not consider his material possessions his own, but as common to all, so as to share them without hesitation when others are in need.’

‘Sidney did not lose his kayak per se, but he may be an empty vessel – a wayward and lost soul without it since it held such importance to him – I mean there’s that cancer thing with his mom,’ pondered Barb out loud. ‘Is Sidney a lost soul now without his kayak – did it sever him from his mom in Heaven - I bet his fiancé thinks Sidney has lost some Essence of his Being now that he is without his kayak. The physical nature of the kayak is meaningless…it’s what the kayak represented in the immaterial and spiritual world that is important. Therefore, as an act of compassion the course of action is to reunite the bereft Sidney with his kayak.’

‘The question is,’ summarised Barb, ‘should Sandra be compassionate toward Alexandra and Sidney – does this situation warrant it?  Should she take on the Saintly role of restoring the kayak to Sidney?’

‘The Jewish outlook on this would be the same,’ said Judith, ‘nothing was stolen, but it is a question of entitlement and doing what’s right.’

‘I remember an old story about a Rabbi settling a dispute between two property owners,’ added Judith. ‘The two men took the Rabbi to the property line that was in question. The Rabbi got down on his knees and put his ear to the ground. When the Rabbi got back to his feet the two men anxiously asked if the land told him who the rightful owner was – which one of the two men owned the land they implored him…the Rabbi said yes the land did tell him…the land said it owns you.’

‘I don’t know if this fable applies here,’ said Judith, ‘but, the story always made me think twice about my ownership of anything.’

‘And the Islamic view is similar, but with a small twist,’ said Raghad, adding, ‘it is a little more definitive about the definition of rightful ownership. I think the fact that Sidney sold his kayak means he must bear that responsibility…not Sandra…she would not be morally wrong to keep it. Ownership of your actions is paramount over ownership of objects. Sidney’s actions are what should prevail here – through his own deeds he lost any entitlement both legal and spiritual to the object.’

‘Ownership is a right…and every right implies a responsibility.’ Raghad said.

‘Every opportunity bears an obligation, every possession bears a duty,’ Raghad said firmly, ‘and Sidney relinquished this duty and therefore his right of possession of the kayak. I think it’s an open-and-shut case.’

‘I see it slightly differently,’ Chandra said politely, ‘from a Buddhist view objects are seen as temptations that distract people from the path of enlightenment - objects such as a kayak should not be coveted.’

Chandra paused as if to retract her words…instead she explained further, ‘however, you can’t entirely escape the world of belongings. Objects can belong to individuals and there is a strict code of ethics and behaviour within Buddhist doctrines like the Four Noble Truths and the Eightfold Path that speak to compassion towards people. First, if you perceive an object to belong to a person other than yourself – then you have no right to this object. It belongs to the other – perceiving such a belief as to who has rightful possession is stronger than what any State laws dictates over such matters. And if it is in your power to do so you should ensure this object is in the rightful hands of the owner…be it spiritual, emotional or legal…you need to account for all this.’

‘In Sandra’s case she came about the object through legal and justifiable means, but in terms of values and ethics she is torn on the matter of ownership because this object had its origins and a true and powerful spiritual connection to Sidney. He only reluctantly gave it up due to his financial hardships and his overarching desire to marry his girlfriend.’

‘Now…Sandra may argue from a Buddhist view that each new possession in our lives loads us with a new weariness…and that she is in fact freeing Sidney of the burden of ownership – she is doing him a favour by reducing the number of his worldly physical possessions - of course this is true, but in this case it is flawed and self-serving reasoning,’ Chandra said and laughed. She then looked Sandra directly in the eyes. ‘Sandra, no offence taken I hope.’

'But, I'm facilitating Sidney's self-sacrifice,' retorted Sandra, 'isn't making sacrifices an important action to take on this path to enlightenment?'

Chandra sat cross-legged on the bench, the end of her index fingers resting on her thumbs, with a playful winked she replied, ‘One of our teachings is to learn not to crave or cling to objects – this is the source of all suffering – we are taught to realize that possessions such as a kayak or a car or even a lover are impermanent, ultimately impersonal, and on some level unsatisfactory – this truth makes it easier to enjoy your belongings and to let go of your possessions when need be…and thus free yourself of undue suffering.’

‘Sandra knows in her heart that this object belongs to Sidney on a spiritual plane of existence,’ said Chandra holding both hands over her heart. ‘If Sandra keeps the object she is breaking no Buddhist rule about stealing…but in my opinion she knows the virtuous course of action is to return the kayak to its rightful owner…if she chooses not to do so she is exacting a cost to her soul because she would be setting back the evolution of her spiritual growth – her enlightenment becomes a more distant goal. Rebirth is conditioned by the karmas of previous lives – Sandra’s actions of body, speech and mind set the karma in motion; good karmas will yield a happier rebirth and eventually enlightenment, bad karmas will produce a rebirth which is unhappy.’

‘Our happiness or suffering depends on how we respond to the present moment. If Sandra clings to the kayak now, her happiness will be fleeting and she will suffer later. If Sandra gives the kayak away, responding with compassion, she creates happiness and well-being for the future,’ said Chandra, summing up her view on the matter.

‘Wow…all this is very interesting,’ said Michelle, ‘just on a personal level I think you would all agree that the objects we value do not exhilarate us so much with their possession as they torment us with their loss.’

‘Well, as an American Native from Southern Saskatchewan I believe in animism: all living and non-living things have a spirit,’ Michelle stated with soulful conviction. ‘This includes people, animals, inanimate objects, and forces of nature. The kayak is an entity with a spirit and a self-fulfilling destiny – destiny moves our lives in circles. Native peoples in particular take stewardship of objects that come and go throughout the cycles of life – ownership is a foreign concept and a crude one at that.’

‘I have shared with you before the insights of a wise and revered Medicine Man, Nicholas Black Elk of the Lakota People - that everything an Indian does is in a circle, and that is because the Power of the World always works in circles, and everything tries to be round. Everything the Power of the World does is done in a circle. The sky is round and the earth is round like a ball and so are the stars. The Wind, in its greatest power whirls. Birds make their nests in circles, for theirs is the same religion as ours. The sun comes forth and goes down again in a circle…the moon does the same, and both are round. Even the seasons form a great circle in their changing and always come back again to where they were. The South, East, West and North winds are embodied in the four quarters of the circle. The life of man is a circle from childhood to childhood and so it is in everything where power moves.’

‘The lives of men and women, as individual expressions of the Power of the World move in and are nourished by an uninterrupted circular…spiral motion. This circle is referred to as the Medicine Wheel. Human beings live, breathe and move, giving additional impetus to the circular movement, provided they live harmoniously, according to the circle's vibratory movement. Every seeker has a chance to eventually discover a harmonious way of living with their environment according to these precepts.’

‘That’s wild,’ Chandra said, then realizing she interrupted Michelle. ‘Sorry Michelle…it’s just that Buddha’s Four Noble Truths is referred to as the setting in motion of the wheel of Dharma - Dharma is the teachings on the truth of enlightenment. The term wheel is used in the Buddha’s teachings to explain life as the cycle or circle of existence. The wheel of Dharma consists of eight trainings, the Eightfold Path, which is seen as spokes in the wheel.’

‘Excuse me for getting carried away,’ implored Chandra, ‘I find the similar references to life as a circle amazing…some kind of Universal Truth – it just blows me away.’ Chandra smiled - it warmed up the entire room. All the women were vibrating with good energy and light.

‘I agree Chandra – that is amazing…and now back full circle and the point I’m making about what Sandra should do about the kayak,’ said Michelle as she reached out and held Sandra's hand. ‘We have a ceremony called the “Giveaway.” For instance, a family celebrating a member's formal entry into the dance circle, or wishing to commemorate the death of a loved one, often hosts a giveaway during a pow-wow.  This tradition embodies the value of sharing with others. Heartfelt gifts such as blankets, beadwork and crafts are given to friends and visitors followed by appropriate songs and dances.’

‘Sidney’s kayak is on a circular course of its own destiny,’ concluded Michelle, ‘and into whose hands it falls is determined by many factors outside the control of people. It would be arrogant or narcissistic to assume that only Sandra and Sidney play a role in the fate of this kayak. This kayak found its way into Sandra’s hands for good reasons – she should do with it as her heart pleases – if she wants to invoke the spirit of the “Giveaway” or not is entirely her choice. Someday in the future the kayak will choose a new owner – it sets its own path around the circle.’

‘There’s way too much mumble-jumble going on here,’ blurted out Jane, ‘this is a pure and simple case of common sense to figure out the right thing to do - you’ve all heard of finders keepers-losers weepers or possession is nine-tenths the law…and so…end of discussion…Sandra didn’t steal the kayak…it’s in her possession…it belongs to her…end of story.’

‘Possession isn't nine-tenths of the law…it’s nine-tenths of the problem,’ countered Chandra, noting that this was a quote from John Lennon.

‘Compassion is Nine-Tenths the Law of Karma,’ Chandra said, proudly adding, ‘that’s my own saying – I just made it up.’

‘Very interesting…all your perspectives on this are over-analyzing and belabouring the facts – too many “what ifs” - except for Michelle’s Native view,’ said Rose, ‘a Taoist would simply go with the flow of things on this and not question the means and outcomes…without foul play the kayak is in Sandra’s possession and that’s that…why muddy the water with thoughts of how this could have gone or complicate the future with a million paths to pick from – it’s a simple course to work out here.’

‘The kayak stays with Sandra and Oliver – the flow of the river of life brought it to them…don’t fight the currents. Some people look into these waters and see their reflection…others see beyond their reflection to the stones at the bottom of the river…others see both…others stir up the waters with a staff - regardless they all perplex over what they see. A Taoist jumps in and goes with the current and flow of the river. These very same currents will take the kayak forward on a journey to who knows where. The Taoist have codes of conduct and respect that aim to establish harmony between people - inner harmony is your business – as long as you are honourable there is no need to fret about the process – enjoy your time with the kayak,’ concluded Rose.

‘I’ll take all these conflicting perspectives to heart,’ said Sandra, ‘and its all sage advice…but, I need to apply some of my own practical wisdom here…my decision is a complex one and has to take into account how thrilled my husband is with his gift as well as the impact on others…like me…and yes the newly-engaged couple - Alexandra and Sidney.’

‘Why don’t you ask Oliver what to do,’ Michelle interjected.

‘Because I know he would say give it back,’ replied Sandra, ‘and I think the right thing to do is more complicated than his knee jerk politeness and notions of political correctness. Before going to bed tonight I will ask Oliver a few questions to see how attached he’s become to the kayak – we’ve already went out with it for a three week trip along the coast of Nova Scotia and he loved it.’

‘My common sense is telling me that he may be very disappointed or even hurt if the kayak is taken from him under such circumstances. Also, the deed is done…I was caught up in the moment of giving this gift to him…it brought me such great joy to know that I fulfill his wish of having the kayak of his dreams.’

‘Talking about circles…well, we’ve done a complete 360 degree review of the facts and what I should do with the kayak,’ summed up Sandra. ‘Insisting that it is in God’s will is as much a concept as insisting that I have free will under these circumstances to determine the outcome. When something happens, it just happens. Sometimes it seems that we made it happen. Some other times it seems that it happened by itself or God made it happen. How you view the happening is more a question of perspective than of fact – and you wonderful friends have given me all kinds of insightful perspectives. Whether it’s my will or God’s will both are just labels to try to make sense of the situation.  In my mind taking off the labels is my way of coming full circle.’

‘I realize I always dream of peace – I hate conflict and strive to create the most good will I can in whatever I do. There is also a big part of me that perpetually seeks atonement…for what I don’t know? It could be a Christian guilt complex…original sin, my improprieties…I don’t know…but generally I’m the one always making sacrifices for others…but at rare times I need to put my needs first and do what makes me happy,’ cried out Sandra.

'I'm free of sin...I'm in the right...but nevertheless there are two bizarre and contrary forces that prevail over my decision to keep the kayak. On the one hand my choice to keep the kayak offers me what I desire...but the very same choice tarnishes the gift in that the kayak is tainted and torments me to be around. In other words, the choice to let Oliver keep the kayak will give me all I asked of it - but the act of gifting it to my husband diminishes the worth to me - I will be living with guilt...for the right or wrong reasons.'

‘Maybe over time,’ said Sandra, ‘I will learn to give up saying “I strive to be a caring person or loving soul,” and get to a point where I say “I no longer think about it…I am,” - maybe someday.’

 ***************************************************************

Later that evening Sandra was thinking how to bring up the topic of the kayak with Oliver. It was 11 p.m. – they were in bed reading their books.

‘Honey, are you sure that’s the right kayak for you – I had a few other ones in mind…I know you wanted that model, but I went out on the limb picking the colour – I was thinking red would be better - if you don’t like the white one I can exchange it,’ she said offhandedly.

‘Are you kidding,’ Oliver said, ‘this is the perfect kayak – the kayak of my dreams…I’ve been eyeing this exact make and model for two years in the paddling magazines – it’s a classic.’

‘It’s just that I thought you may find a white kayak boring – I wasn’t sure…now that I think of it I kind of see you in a red kayak,’ Sandra flung out the thought hoping it would get him thinking – she was quite prepared to buy a new replacement kayak at full price.

‘Nope, white is the perfect colour – it would have been my first choice,’ replied Oliver.

‘I’ve even baptized her as “Crystal,” she’s a real beauty.’

 ***************************************************************

The next day Sandra called up Alexandra, ‘Hi Alexandra, I’m sorry but my husband is too attached to the kayak…he won’t split with it.’

The phone went silent. ‘Hi Alexandra, are you there,’ said Sandra.

Sandra could hear Alexandra crying, then through her sobbing Alexandra replied, ‘I understand, thank you for considering it…bye.’ Alexandra quickly ended the call before Sandra could respond.

Sandra felt terrible, but this was meant to be – fate had set this into motion the day Alexandra’s fiancé drove to the store with the kayak on his rooftop. Besides, Sandra thought, what a wonderful story this will be for Alexandra to tell her children someday – the story of how Dad loved Mom so much that he sold his beloved kayak to buy the engagement ring. Sandra thought that in the end everyone will be happy. She took a deep breath and exhaled…and then inhaled a load of guilt.

 ***************************************************************

Over the next five years Oliver and Sandra kayaked throughout Ontario, Quebec and the East coast. They even drove to Florida and paddled the Gulf of Mexico among the manatee and dolphins.

Then into the sixth year of owning the kayak Oliver turned over a new leaf in his outdoor pursuits. Bob and Cindy asked Oliver and Sandra to go camping in Algonquin Park – Oliver hadn’t been there for years. Algonquin Park was best navigated by canoe - you don’t want to portage with a kayak. Preparing for the trip, Oliver pulled down their old 16 foot fibreglass Prospector Canoe from the garage rafters – it had been idle for years and had cobwebs all over the insides.

After the trip both Oliver and Sandra were reminded how much they love canoeing and camping. Oliver realized that lugging around a sixty pound canoe was a little too much work for him at his age. The next week they contacted a local master canoe builder and placed an order for high-end light weight Kevlar canoe. From that point forward all their treks were in the new canoe they baptized as “Abby” and tattooed with a crest of five loons on the bow – ever since then their two kayaks hung undisturbed in the garage.

 ***************************************************************

It was now early November 2013 – ten years since Sandra bought Oliver's kayak. Oliver was purging the garage. He took Crystal, the kayak, off the rack in the garage and put her in the front lawn. She was sitting in the sun with cobwebs all over her…it represented the past - the long gone days of their passion for kayaking. Oliver washed the kayak and it looked brand new.

‘Well…we have to find Crystal a new home,’ said Oliver.

Sandra thought that now was a good time to tell Oliver the entire story about how she bought the kayak. All this time Sandra had kept Oliver in the dark – she didn’t tell him about the romantic couple, the fiancé’s sacrifice or the attempt of his lover to win back the kayak. They were in the garage moving the canoe to the back rack when she told Oliver the entire story. His eyes went black and he looked pale.

‘Sandra, how could you do such a thing to a young couple in love like that,’ he said, showing that he was clearly aggravated.

‘You say that now, Honey, but I don’t think you’d see it so black and white back then – and believe me it was a serious moral dilemma for me at the time – since I could hardly afford to buy you a brand new kayak,’ she said, ‘but, we shouldn’t argue about it now – it’s water under the bridge.’

‘Is there any way to find these people,’ said Oliver, ‘maybe they’d like to have it back…I’d be willing to give it to them for free.’

Sandra went into the house and within seconds found the note with Alexandra’s phone number. She called the number. The line belonged to someone else. Her last name wasn’t on the note and the Peak Experience had closed down – there was no way of finding out who they were.

‘Alright, I’m sure John can write a story about this in his newspaper,’ said Oliver, ‘if the couple is around our area they’ll see or hear about the story and come claim the kayak.’

Their neighbour John was a Senior Writer for the local newspaper. The paper ran the story on the following weekend and many people were touched by the effort to find the young romantic couple, but no one came forth.  They even posted the story on social media Internet sites. A week went by and nothing turned up.

‘We should give the kayak to Tony,’ said Oliver.

Tony was Oliver’s younger brother. He just moved back from a three year departure from Kingston – he was helping out with clean water projects in Africa.

Oliver told Tony the entire story about the kayak.

'Fantastic story...I praise your efforts to get the kayak back to that couple,' said Tony, 'but, if the kayak needs a new home I'll be glad to take care of it.'

 ***************************************************************

Tony came by his brother's house on Sunday at 6 a.m. - it was the 17th of November. The almost full moon was still lingering in the sky - it is called the freezing moon in November - Sunday night was the actual full moon. Oliver and the rest of the family were still in bed. The kayak was on the front lawn for Tony to pick up. He put the kayak on his rooftop. He decided to keep it at his girlfriend’s place. Tony's girlfriend, Karlene, was a teacher. He met her in Africa. She moved back to Canada and was teaching at a Native reserve. She lived north of Sudbury on a lake – clearly the best home for the kayak. With the kayak secured on his car Tony drove to Tim Horton’s, got a coffee and then he set out on his long drive to Karlene’s place.